


Fire Hose

by Sometimes_I_Write_Things



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Cum everywhere, Drug-Induced Sex, Hand Jobs, M/M, Recreational Drug Use
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-30
Updated: 2014-07-30
Packaged: 2018-02-10 23:43:54
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,561
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2044677
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sometimes_I_Write_Things/pseuds/Sometimes_I_Write_Things
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Gamzee and Karkat meet for the first time, but first impressions are misconstrued when Gamzee has one pie too many.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Fire Hose

Today is the day, the day you meet Karbro. You finally get to see the troll behind all those angry gray letters. You have to admit, you’re a little nervous. Karkat seems like a one of those proper motherfuckers with there shit all up and together and what not. Maybe you should eat more pie, and another, and another. Just one more, maybe another one. Shit when did the floor get its gumption to up and be touching you?

~~~~~~~~

This is the fourth fucking time you’ve knocked! That shit-head clown HAS to have heard you yelling and pounding on this fucking door by now! Maybe the ass is so high he forgot. It wouldn’t be much of a surprise really. Should you just go back to your hive? What if something happened to him? You turn the handle and, it’s unlocked. You curse your past self for not trying that sooner before walking inside.

"Gamzee Makara! I have been knocking for fuck knows how long! Get your ass out here and explain yourself! GAMZEE!"

You hear a noise coming from down the hall. Is that him? What if it’s his lusus? No, Gamzee’s told you his lusus doesn’t stick around for more than 10 minutes. You hear the noise again. That’s definitely Gamzee. It sounds like he’s in pain. You walk down the hall, tracing the noises until you arrive at what must be the clown’s respiteblock, judging by recuperacoon and the freaky posters. And there he is, the fuckass is sprawled out on the floor babbling and murmuring like an idiot. Go figure.

"Gamzee? Gamzee get your sorry ass up! Hey! It’s me Karkat!"

He doesn’t move to get up, just kind of rocks side to side on his back. He mumbles out louder. You make your way into his block to get a better look at him. His eyes are rolling around in his head and he looks as if he’s trying to form words but his tongue would rather flop around in his mouth.

"Gamzee! Hey you okay? Answer me you shit clown!" You give him a few smacks to the cheek and he yelps before blabbering.

"Shhmmmmuuuaauughh aahblaugh…"

Well that was fucking helpful. You take in your surroundings and spot several empty pie tins, about 12. Shit did he eat all those TODAY? You sigh before getting up to hunt for the ablutions block. You find it eventually and fill a one of the pie tins you found laying around with cold water. You come back to Gamzee’s block to find him in the same state you left him. You step around him so he can see you, if his eyes could focus on one damn spot long enough, and dump the water in his face in an attempt to sober him up. He just squeals and flops about on his back for a minute and you think it might be working until he falls back into his stupor. 

You pinch the bridge of your nose and groan in frustration. This was not at all how you planned for this meeting to go. You catch something moving on him in the corner of your eye and before you know it, you’re staring wide-eyed at Gamzee’s crotch. Your can feel the blush start to rise in your cheeks before you force it back down. Gamzee is obviously a highblood from what you can tell of his build and you don’t want to chance him going nuts over your freakish blood color. Knowing this fucker he might not even have the capacity in his burnt out pan to even notice it, really. You stare at this pathetic excuse of a troll and you get an awful, disgusting idea of how to snap him out of this. You take a few deep breaths before you sit down next to him and put your poorly thought out plan into action.

You brush two fingers over his clothed bulge, just to ease him into what you’re about to do and he moans. He fucking moans really LOUD! You barely even touched him yet! You steel your nerves, determined to go through with this and tell yourself you’re just helping him, you’re not doing this for you but for him. You reach out again and push the heel of your hand into his crotch and he arches into the touch, whining high and loud. Fucking dammit just do it! You take hold of his bulge through his ridiculous clown pants and begin a steady stroke up and down the writhing appendage. He’s bucking violently and making such heated noises that you can’t help but blush now. 

Suddenly, his back arches high off the floor and he wails. Finally! You can see the genetic material make a rather large wet spot in his clothes and you pull your hand away. You don’t want his jizz all over your hand after all. You sit back and watch, waiting for him to ride it out and come back to his senses. He claws at the ground, making deep trenches in the floor and you’re kind of freaked out by all this, and maybe a little aroused…maybe. He’s arching and collapsing erratically and sobbing out moans for what seems like forever. In fact, it doesn’t look like his climax is stopping any time soon. There’s already a puddle forming under him and his pants are beyond ruined. 

"Dammit Gamzee would you just finish already!"

"AaAuUuGgHhH I mMmNcAn’T sToOaAhHhH!"

Holy fucking shit that is a lot of genetic material. You make out “I can’t stop” through all his whining and you very nearly panic. You scramble closer to him and yank his pants off of him. You flush furiously at the sight you’re met with. His nook is leaking a steady flow of indigo and his bulge, fucking hell his bulge! It’s flailing this way and that, spraying material everywhere and some of it splashes onto your sweater. You have absolutely no idea what to do here!

You go with the first thing that comes to mind, grabbing the base and squeezing to cut off the flow. It stops but Gamzee starts whimpering. Your eyes shoot to his face and there are pale indigo tears streaking down his face.

"Hurts it hurrmmmff it hurts shmaubluh hurts!"

Well fuck, you don’t mean to hurt the poor fool. You release your grip immediately and he fucking screams! His bulge practically erupts, shooting the largest collection of material you’ve ever seen in one, violent burst. You can’t do anything but gape as you’re covered in his cum. It drips from your hair, from your chin and all you can do is sit there like an idiot as the clown finally slumps to the floor and stays there. His chest heaves as he does his damnest to catch his breath. You address him in the softest voice you’ve ever heard yourself use.

"Are you okay now?"

His eyes flutter shut and just like that, he’s out. At least it’s fucking over.

~~~~~~

Motherfuuuuuuuck what just happened? You wake up with something hot and tiny touching your face and your bulge aching something fierce. You attempt to sit up but those little warm spots are at your shoulders, pushing you back down into what feels like someone’s lap. 

"Here you piece of shit. Drink this"

Your eyes shoot up and there’s a angry looking troll with the most motherfucking adorable looking little horns pushing a cup of water to you lips. You do as he says and gulp down the miracle that graces your parched lips. Once you finish you attempt to speak.

"Karbro?"

"Yeah it’s Karbro you bulge muncher. Nice to finally fucking meet your sorry ass."

Oh yeah! That’s right, Karkat was coming to visit today. You wrack your sopor addled pan and try to remember what happened. One minute you were eating a bitchtits pie and you got all kinds of nervous and ate some more, maybe one too many, and… ohhhhhhhh. You look down at yourself to find your wicked clown pants gone and your bulge just kinda, flopped to the side. Huh. That’s weird.

"Shit brother. I all up and caused you some unmirthful trouble didn’t I?"

"Yeah you did! I’m going to be traumatized for life thanks to you! But whatever, as long as you’re okay… Can you uh… put that thing back in?"

Oh ain’t that just the cutest thing! He’s up and blushing! Red huh? That sure is a motherfucking bright red. You reach down and try to push your bulge back into it’s sheathe and wince. It hurts like hell and your arms are all noodle-y. The warmth behind you suddenly disappears but then reappears on your bulge. You make a soft noise as you watch Karkat slip your bulge back in with concentration etched in his features. 

"There. You should sleep or something. You probably used up all your fucking energy with that shit you pulled.And uh…we should never speak of this again. Ever! Or I swear I’ll rip off your bulge and strangle you with it!"

You laugh at your tiny bro’s threat as he helps you into your ‘coon. He even stays to stroke your hair as you slip into wicked slumber. Your name is Gamzee Makara and you think you just met the best little motherfucker on Alternia.


End file.
